Probably, some people have quite a reasonable question – why do I need to dominate in this very relationship?
After all, she’s mine and she’s not going anywhere. So now I can safely cut down this regime of “leadership” and again return to a quiet and so calm passive state of irresponsibility.
In principle, if you originally set yourself such a goal – to get a girl, and then relax, dangling legs, I congratulate you all turned out, and it makes sense to read you this article, I do not see.
But if you want a long and strong relationship, then I must tell you right away – you have to be strong, brave and responsible always. But don’t worry – there are small exceptions where you can afford it!
A lot of relationships and marriages break up precisely because the guys who were at the beginning of the best versions of themselves and dominated with the girls (which attracted their passions), then, when they got what they wanted, suddenly began to allow themselves frivolity and weakness, became apathetic and gave the reins to their girls, which the latter are not very satisfied.
Guys just forget about such an important thing – girls always, absolutely always, even after 20 years of marriage will monitor you on how much you are the man who met them in the beginning. A sort of monthly qualification of you on men’s qualities.
Are you asking yourself same question:
- Are you as strong morally as you were in the beginning?
- Are you still the same leader?
- Are you also still taking responsibility for your own and, in many ways, her actions too?
What do a lot of guys do when they have a steady girlfriend? That’s right – relax. The leadership frame disappears in them. And of course, as soon as you do not pass this exam – the girls begin to look for a new relationship on the side, as no one needs rags. Except for the BDSM girls.
And then the guys sit and don’t understand what even happened? It was so awesome, why did she leave? What did I do wrong? Or even worse, but unfortunately and more common – it’s just a dumb whore. Already, distorts from such conclusions.
To avoid such problems and organize a strong, long relationship and that would be sexual interest in you is not lost, you need to learn to dominate the relationship.
So make the following steps – start from being a leader
Always. Even in trifles. No, I’d say even so – especially in the details. As what we usually consider trivial and of type “here you can fake it and give the reins to the girl” – it is in such moments of weakness and disappear from all the girls feelings for you. And by “be a leader,” I mean always choose the course of your relationship. Starting from what country to go on vacation and when to go to their parents, and ending with the fact that during the walk you always decide which way to go.
Remember that guys like a mantra and keep always in your mind – you may love your sweet and beautiful angel, the face and figure which stops the heart, but even if this cute little angel is angry and does not agree in which direction to go in the Park, and you have almost itching desire to please her – do not let his desire to even have a chance, and go where told to go you.
Believe me, this game is worth the candle. If she sees that even in a relationship, you still keep leading frame, of course, “to view,” they say you don’t love me. But if you honor will constantly pass these tests – your passion will each time more and more fall in love with you.
Of course, you should not turn into a tyrant and a dictator, because if you go too far, then for a girl it will be a signal that you are not confident in yourself, if you need total control. No, and in this rule there are exceptions, and sometimes its leader rights can be partially delegated to the girl and even the girl sometimes want to switch the tables a little and to “steer” in the relationship.
For example, to give a little leadership to your girl in cases where she is a priori more competent. For example, if in the kitchen, the mistress of your passion, in the store, you simply perform the role of a wallet and a porter, and exactly what to take, how and what to cook even if already decided by your girl. Of course, your word is still the law even in this cute game if you intervene and want to make your adjustments, but a little leadership is sometimes useful to give.
Or, for example, in bed sometimes a girl wants to steer the process – to be on top, to determine the sense of rhythm and frictions, perhaps even tie you and make you more vulnerable. It’s okay, sometimes, I repeat – sometimes you can go to such things. After all, relationships are compromises after all.
But most importantly, remember the following – in such exceptions, always remember who is in charge and do not give too much authority.
There are no exceptions to the rules and compromises. You are always responsible for your decisions and point. If you made any decision based on the opinion of the girl, and it turned out to be wrong – if you blame the girl, then everything is the beginning of the end of your relationship, since at this moment you have lost all respect for you in your passion. Blame you. You made the wrong decision, not your girlfriend. Hence the answer for him and you. For example, if you are driving on the road, and the girl advised you to turn here, they say the way faster, and in the end the way is generally closed, and you need to go back and go around all over again – you are to blame, not the girl, because you made the decision. Of course, you can make a little joke about the clumsiness of her Navigator, but in any case not to blame. Even in jest. Can even yourself a little with humor, make the decision before her, but not her in any case.
Also in this paragraph include the following – always keep your word, especially in front of his girlfriend:
- Promised to arrive in 7 – please arrive at 7.
- Promised to fix the crane by the weekend – be kind to fix it or find those who will fix.
How the word will be executed is not important – the main thing that it would be executed. Always, even in the most petty matter.
If you start before the girl not to keep his word, respect for you will disappear, like love, so better think 100 times before to know what to say. Seriously, if you are not sure that the word will be fulfilled, it is better not to promise anything. The only exception here – you are either physically unable to do it and do the word in the near future, or you are dying. Everything else is just excuses.
Don’t show your weakness
Of course, we are not all iron and sometimes we want to complain about a neighbor, boss, yourself, your life. Sometimes we just want to whine in front of someone. They pour all that shit on their girl.
Very. Very. Well, a very gross mistake. Never, I repeat – never complain about anyone or anything in front of your girlfriend. Even if you complain – just offer solutions to this problem or translate everything into humor. If you have a head of shit, it is not necessary with joy pour dirt in front of the girl. It is better to say – honey, what can you do in this situation. In the councils of the girl there is nothing wrong, sometimes it even helps to bring. If of course, you do not shift the responsibility for their adoption on the adviser, do not forget the second point guys.
Of course, there are times when we do not want to make decisions, not to be responsible for anything, or you just limp under the weight of problems, and corny you want to be sad. And someone sometimes just want to get drunk and lie drunk under the table (although I do not approve, in General it is better to exclude alcohol from life, especially from a relationship with a girl). Here, too, do not make the grossest mistake – do not show up in front of his girlfriend.
For such cases, there are friends, a psychologist, and even passers-by, but not your girl. All the hardships of fate in front of her should be taken with a proudly raised head. Also no exceptions. Moreover, how would the girl not want you to know it is not going to understand, because it thinks in different categories. So you want to cry – cry other’s shoulder or to himself, but not before the girl.
I’m sorry, guys, but I don’t want you to be spineless wimps, and I want you to understand that a relationship with a girl is still a responsibility.
Of course, you may think that all this is lost naturalness, they say – well, it’s not me, why so many conventions and rules – is not it easier to just be yourself? No, guys, if you’re supposed to be a rag and a mattress under yourself, it doesn’t mean you’re yourself, it means you’re just going down the path of least resistance. To be a leader with the girls, and especially in a relationship – this is just the same should be natural for you, and that’s what should become for you over time to be yourself.
Besides, it’s worth it. Believe me, the girl will be crazy about you if you are a responsible leader in the relationship.